Wednesday, May 02, 2007

Truth Be Told

A big thanks to Lulu for coming up with some questions that made me think about myself a bit. Hey, I'm a Psychology student. Analysis is the name of the game.

1. I posited to CP recently that we are who we were in high school. In what ways are you the same person now as you were as a 15-year-old?

I think in a lot of ways I am the same person that I was when I was 15. Lulu leaked this question to me last night on our way to the gym, so I've had some time to think about it. When I was in early elementary school, I was what I guess some people would call one of the popular kids. I was invited to all of the parties and the "queen bee" was my supposed best friend. I also learned pretty early that popular does not mean nice and that most of the girls I hung out with, my BFF in particular, were evil climbers willing to step on anyone in their way. I wasn't one of them. I wanted to be one of them, but I knew I could never be, because I am too nice. Maybe this is where part of my overdeveloped sense of justice began to kick in, but I couldn't stand to see these girls be so mean to other people. They were awful.

Fortunately, at the beginning of seventh grade we moved. I had a chance to start all over. I don't know if I consciously did it or not at this time, but I managed to choose much nicer people as friends. Slowly, because I was an overinvolved overachiever I managed to make a lot of friends, both popular and unpopular. I was one of the only people who would talk to the mentally impaired girls in our PE class, but I also was on athletic teams and in student council, so I knew a lot of the really popular kids.

When high school started, all bets were off. You end up having lunch with random people and not necessarily with your friends. I was invited the first few weeks of school to eat with the popular girls. I hated it. Just like I had remembered from earlier in my life, they were awful shallow evil people. One day I just stopped going to lunch with them. No goodbye, no reason. I remember walking into the cafeteria and thinking to myself that I would sit with the first person I knew that wasn't part of their group. I ended up sitting with someone who is my friend to this day. A smart girl who could have cared less about any of the goings on at our high school.

So, back to the question. Yes, I am still that girl. I mistrust people who are social climbers and I have no patience for social games. I don't want to be part of their group. I make no pretenses about this in my life. I live on the fringes of the playground, avoiding all "those" people. While I realize that some of them are probably nice enough, I just can't play the games that you end up playing to be part of that group. I suppose this is all what laid the groundwork for my life as an alternachick. I prefer my friends to be smart, funny, and passionate about something. I can't say that I'm necessarily a fuck authority person, but I am probably a fuck society person. And, yeah, I think I was that way at 15.

2. Which blogger do you most want to meet?

Since I've had the fortune to meet many of my fellow bloggers, the person I would most like to meet is Echo. I'm not sure if we were seperated at birth, but I'm pretty sure that our iPods were. Echo seems like a smartass music lover, which are traits I place high on my "want to get to know you" list. He is also a parent and we have discovered that we have similar childrearing theories. Mind you, they are only theories, because those little buggers can ruin anyone's best laid plans.

3. Your children are highly entertaining. What is the strangest thing one of them (or both) has ever done?

I'm not sure if this was the strangest, but it was certainly the most embarrassing. We were at a family function (with lots of people watching and listening) and Bink, who was about 4, decided he wanted to climb on top of a balcony railing. I quickly told him "no" and that he would surely fall to his death. This is when Sweetness, who was about 7, pipes up. "Yeah, and Mommy and Daddy can't have any more kids because her eggs are all rotten." Clearly she had heard us have the conversation about not having another kid and feeling older, but come on! There were several gems that came out of this period, when she began to ask questions about the birds and the bees. I have been told that I will NEVER have grandchildren and the moment she put 2 and 2 together and realized what it took to have a kid, she said, "Couldn't we just touch elbows or something?"

Bink's defining moment actually occurred when I was not present, but Lulu was. They had gone to get ice cream and Bink was in his Mr. Roboto phase, dancing up a storm in front of the Dairy Queen on a pretty busy street. Apparently, Sweetness was expressing dismay at his conduct, which prompted him to chant, "We share DNA!" at her over and over again. Delightful little buggers they are.

4. Music is an obvious theme in your life. What music did you listen to in your younger days that thoroughly embarrasses you now?

From the moment I got my first radio, I was an addict. I would lock myself in my room hour after hour listening to whatever I thought was the most wild thing I could get away with. Sadly, this occurred in the mid-seventies and I don't have to tell you what was on FM back then. Sure, I was real badass with my love of bands like Foghat and Aerosmith, but I also can sing all the lyrics to many '70's gems like "The Year of the Cat," "Dreamweaver," "Let Your Love Flow," and my personal sing-along favorite "I'm Not in Love" by 10cc. Sadly, I can't remember a damn thing these days, but these songs are etched into my memory for eternity. I graduated from the pablum to real rock and roll somewhere around eighth grade. I can proudly say that I never really fell victim to the clutches of disco. I was already a loyal WLUP (The Loop) listener and was digging The Rolling Stones, Led Zeppelin, and The Who. At one point in my life I had decided that if I saw all three of these bands live, I could die happy. Two thirds of that came true, and we held tickets to a Zeppelin show that was never to be. Curse you John Bonham! I will die unfulfilled.

5.What overused cliche or quote do you find to be true in your life?

Overused quote of choice for me is, "Everything in moderation." Except music. I am neither too clean or too messy. I drink, but not too much. I enjoy food, but try not to overdo it. I exercise, but am not freakish about it. I am a parent, but it doesn't define me. I could go on. I think life is about finding the balance that works for you. If I find myself tilting the scales too far one way, I end up being really unhappy and usually try to take steps to correct the problem. As an adult it can be hard trying to find the balance between the things you HAVE to do and the things you WANT to do. I'm still learning. And there's another quote that I'd bring up."You can't teach an old dog new tricks." I find that to be a really depressing quote. I refuse to believe that we are incapable of change. If that's the case, then I am in the wrong field and there is no hope for humanity. Anyone can change. You have to want to and it takes a lot of work. Sometimes you even need a refresher course along the way, but we are all capable of being better than we are today.


Grant Miller said...

I've met Echo before. He's not all that.

Chris said...

I think something a bunch of us in this little blogging circle share is that we, too, were on the "fringes of the playground" and perhaps still are.

Tenacious S said...

Grant, you're just jealous.

Chris, I REALLY am on the fringes of the playground. I hated it then and I hate it now. Being a parent sometimes feels like living through all of the horror all over again. I avoid as many of the parent games as possible. I have no patience for any of it.

Beth said...

Very cool. I love living on the fringes of the playground to this day.

lulu said...

I adore that 10cc song, although every time I hear it, I have to laugh, because I always think of Lynnette (or maybe it was Nancy) who thought that the lyrics were "be poised and quiet, be poised and quiet"

Dale said...

Lulu really brings out the best (answers) in you! Great stories about almost being a Heather, your kids and those damned 70s lyrics I can't shake either.

Anonymous said...

where #1 is concerned, I'm still playing with myself waaaay too much.